“The present moment holds infinite riches beyond your wildest dreams, but you will only enjoy them to the extent of your faith and love. . . . To discover God in the smallest and most ordinary things, as well as in the greatest, is to possess a rare and sublime faith.”
Jean Pierre de Caussade
I love pondering this quote from a Jesuit priest (1675-1751) and what it means for the intersection of cross-gender friendship and sexuality. In focusing on a second book on the connection between theology, sexuality, and friendship, it is acutely humbling at times to become in touch with the vast disciplines, within theology and beyond--i.e., "secular," speaking into this massive (it's not small) intersection where sexuality and friendship intersect.
Of course, if we have any robust view of God's creation, how can we deem any discipline, secular? But that's for another time.
It's quite humbling in the sense that it is beyond my puny self to think for one nanosecond, that I, can claim any sort of "God's eye view" of what contemporary theologian Sarah Coakley calls, "the profound entanglement of our human sexual desire and our desire for God."
To begin any kind of in-depth research into this entanglement that so impacts authentic deep desires for cross-sex friendship, one is immediately confronted with conservative views of post-Freudian sexuality that want to throw friendship under the bus, as well as progressive views of post-Freud sexuality that want to throw friendship under the bus with meta-claims about "pure" sexual desire between two consenting adults.
It's quite humbling to see the boundaries for the infinite riches of friendship immediately collapse for some progressive tribes and conservative tribes when the potential for sexual attraction and sexual desire is at stake. Humbling in the ultimate sense, I cannot resolve the mystery of this messy entanglement.