"I wish I could say I am motivated by love totally and entirely. I love Jesus, yes but I also fear him. I fear his return for Judgment Day, when he will come like a thief in the night, when I most likely will be found not ready, and I will shoot straight to hell, my soul boring through the bedrock and limestone straight to the fires. I can't quite get my literalistic mind around how I can burn for eternity, so I settle on being stung by hornets, and that is bad enough. That, and the shame I imagine in my parent's eyes as I trudge off behind the devil. The sermons I half-listened to on Sunday morning, Sunday Evening, and Wednesday evening all carry with them cautionary tales of not being ready, and how awful that would be, and how disappointed God. And we know not when it will happen. "